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This weekend marked the one-year anniversary of the last time Tiger Woods won a golf tournament. The one-year anniversary of Tiger Woods getting in a car crash and having his marriage publicly unravel and all sorts of tawdry affairs revealed is coming up. In a possibly connected story, Tiger’s begun tweeting and “wrote” a first-person essay for Newsweek.

Despite trying to get on top of the car crash anniversary stories, Tiger may also be trying to upstage Prince William’s engagement. I know if I was Princess Diana up in heaven, I’d have a tough time focus on all that royal wedding buzz when I could look forward to gaining insight into Tiger’s perverted mind through his illuminating tweets.

Tiger (@tigerwoods) sent out this first historic tweet on Wednesday: “What’s up everyone. Finally decided to try out twitter!” One typo, but Tiger(‘s ghost tweeter) finally lets each of us know that he really cares what is up with us.  Two hours later, @tigerwoods sent out a second tweet of gratitude: “Yep, it’s me. I think I like this twitter thing. You guys are awesome. Thanks for all the love.” I guess he enjoyed reading what was up.

The Newsweek article was almost as vapid and all Hallmark McOprah. I wonder if Tiger is even involved in the ghost writer selection process or if it’s totally up to his handlers. Maybe something interesting will accidentally slip through in future Tiger tweets or first-person essays — it’s kind of got a detention assignment vibe, doesn’t it?  Will Tiger eventually go more of a Lebron James route and have a Nike commercial where he’s writing on a chalkboard “I will not have crazy extramarital Ambien sex with porn stars” a hundred times? Follow him on Twitter and find out!