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Archive for May, 2010

Added May 28th, 2010 by Chalk
NFL

Lions Extend Cheerleader-less Streak To 81 Years

The Detroit Lions will remain without cheerleaders for the foreseeable future according to team president Tom Lewand.  The Lions, entering their 81st season in 2010, have never had cheerleaders.  The only other NFL franchise that has never had cheerleaders are the New York Giants, who have had five more cheerless seasons than Detroit.

Lewand told an intrepid Detroit News reporter that it’s simply a matter of priorities for a team still trying to dig itself out of Matt Millen’s hole:

My focus has been what happens on the field.  I don’t think that the folks in Green Bay and Pittsburgh and some of the other places get asked a lot about cheerleaders. And one of the big reasons for that is because they’re successful on the field. And that’s where our focus is. The more entertainment we can provide by winning football games, that’s where our focus should be.

 
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Added May 27th, 2010 by Ryan
NBA

Kendrick Perkins Cleared for Game Six

After game three of the Eastern Conference Finals, the Orlando Magic looked like they were on the verge of getting swept in the series as they had absolutely no answer on offense for the lockdown Boston Celtics defense. Even though the Celtics are still arguably the best team in these East Finals, the Magic has found a way to fight back and make it a series with two straight wins and some much needed momentum and confidence headed into game six in Boston.

During game one through game three, it was no contest as the Boston Celtics just seemed to dominated the Orlando Magic in every aspect of the game, but in game four Dwight Howard and company were finally able to get the best of the Celtics as they battled back and forth with Boston, forced overtime and came out with the win to stay alive.

 
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Added May 27th, 2010 by Chalk
NFL

Shanahan Confident Moss In The Clear With HGH Talk

Last week Washington Redskins receiver Santana Moss met with new head coach Mike Shanahan and a small group of teammates to discuss reports linking him to a Canadian doctor charged with smuggling and supplying human growth hormone.  Shanahan is giving his star player his complete support:

I feel really good about where he’s at. I feel real good that he’ll be, I don’t know if ‘vindicated’ is the word, but when people find out all the facts, everything will be OK.

Translation: we’re not completely screwed.  Shanahan also said he’s not worried that the NFL will suspend Moss.

Shanahan should know a thing or two about players and doping.  In his sixteen years as an NFL coach, his only two titles came at the end of John “Mr. Ed” Elway’s career when the big-toothed three-time Super Bowl loser was doped up on horse tranquilizers and horse steroids.

 
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Added May 27th, 2010 by Chalk
NHL

Yzerman Bolts Detroit For Lightning GM Job

Steve Yzerman had a nice little playing career for the Detroit Red Wings.  He made nine All-Star teams, won more Stanley Cups than Mario Lemieux, and was inducted into the Hall of Fame in 2009.  After retiring in 2006, he spent four years in Detroit’s front office as an executive vice president.  He also served as executive director for Canada’s gold-winning 2010 Olympic hockey team.  Now he’s moving on to become general manager of the Tampa Bay Lightning.

The Lightning are a bit of a mess, having missed the playoffs the past three seasons with three different coaches.  Considering Tampa’s last high profile signing — head coach Barry Melrose was brought in and then canned after 16 games — the bar for Yzerman should be pretty low.

 
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Added May 27th, 2010 by Chalk
MLB

Ozzie Guillen Calls Ump “a F****** A******” Asked why umpire Joe West ejected him in last night's game, White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen told reporters it's "because he's a f---ing a--hole."

 
Added May 26th, 2010 by Ryan
NBA

Suns Contain Lakers for Second Straight Win in West Finals With the first two games of the West Finals in the books and the Lakers absolutely dominating the Suns in those games, many people had Kobe Bryant and company headed to their third straight NBA Finals, but that may have been a bit premature as Steve Nash has been able to lead his squad from behind to tie up the series at 2-2 heading back to Los Angeles.

 
Added May 26th, 2010 by Chalk
NFL

New Jersey Awarded Super Bowl XLNYCVIII In 2014 Tuesday, the NFL awarded the 2014 Super Bowl to what they prefer to call New York or New York/New Jersey. But it's New Jersey!

 
Added May 26th, 2010 by Chalk
MLB

Suspended Games Are Dumb (Like Outdoor Baseball) God hates suspended games. God hates outdoor baseball. So should you. Here's why...

 
Added May 26th, 2010 by Chalk
NHL

Blackhawks Star Won’t Replace Teeth Until After Finals Defenseman Duncan Keith of the Chicago Blackhawks, champions of the Western Conference, is raising the bar with his playoff mouth.

 
Added May 25th, 2010 by Ryan
NBA

Orlando Magic Finally Get the Best of the Boston Celtics in Game Four Throughout the first three games of the Eastern Conference Finals, the two-time Defensive Player of the Year Dwight Howard has basically been a non-factor, especially on the offensive end of the basketball floor. Even though Howard really struggled to find himself on the offensive side of the basketball floor in this series, game four was another story altogether as Superman finally remembered how to fly.